deleting.

something someone once said to me. i just cancled two words and put in another two. ithurts
fuck this is not easy. seeing u online but not talking.
i shall go off DELETE YOU so i cant see u online.

my computer's being slow again.
sorry for the lack of daily updates.
seem to have lost my muse.
or my mood, actually.

i hate how somethings go. it feels really fake. and i feel really fake too, sometimes. been off in my own little world. but its not surprising. daydreaming and stoning are similar. its been daydreaming, recently. not stoning. many random thoughts lately, and they've been weird. i imagine impossible senarios. pretty self deluding.

i went to the doctors yesterday. saw the nurse saw the cast off. ask me if you're interested in viewing the video i took. you can find me on msn. =) its odd, really. my foot's still swollen. after six long weeks not using it, i seem to have forgotten how to walk. the fear of placing too much weight also adds on to the difficulity of regaining my footing. sadly, my muscle has disintegrated to the point where i cant support my own weight. thats the reason why im still using one crutch.

today was a long day. im feeling tired. i hope i can sleep at 11pm again, like i did last night. the extra hour of sleep helps, even if the effect is minute. i fell asleep during econs lecture today. its pretty pointless, going for lecture. the chapter now is rather straightforward, and i understand the notes. whatever she's lecturing about isnt much of a help.
spent one and a half hours in the car today. mum picked me up at 6pm from sji, where i was watching my fellow gymnastic teammates train. got teased abit, but its all in the name of fun. went down to toapayoh lor8 to buy otah. passed by my bf's house. really miss her loads! headed down to ijtp after that to pick up my sisters, my brother and my sister's friends. went a whole big round dropping people off. didnt reach home till 8pm.

finished 'the hunt for red october' last evening. i say, its a good read. enjoyed the book greatly. i think tom clancy is a genius at russian and usa military fiction. he may be a bit long winded at times, but he generally produces good work. props!
reading a new book now. 'lion of macedon' by david gemmell. borrowed it from weikan. am at page 90 now, hope to finish maybe half or more of the book by tonight, so when i finish it during my breaks tomorrow, i can pass it on to shamir.

wordy entry today. with no pictures to accomodate. i wonder who reads my blog. i know i have some daily readers, but have simply no idea who they are. leave a tag? yes.

i miss michael! was reading his blog just now. i still think he's a genuis with the language. im jealous. i really should find a way to improve my grammer and my ability to expand thoughts.

enough for now, i think. im getting tired. i need to buy a new pillow!

and many thanks to the super super nice guy who made my day today by buying me the cadbury fruit and nut chocolate that ive been craving. =D